Blog Posts

New Blog Post: (Sandy Bottom(s)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MYlyKi #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/07/07/sandy-bottoms/

Sandy Bottom(s)

Today’s story involves a couple of guys that I picked up at the start of my day.  But first, let me go back a few steps and explain how I begin most of my shifts.

When I head out, if it’s before 8pm then I always go get a car wash and vacuum everything out.  Front, back, and trunk.  I wipe down the seats with lemon cleaner wipes and make sure everything’s nice and clean.  If I think that I’m not going to make it out before 8pm (that’s when the car wash closes), then I will do it at the end of my shift so either way, at the beginning the Jeep is nice and cleaned.

Continue reading “New Blog Post: (Sandy Bottom(s)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MYlyKi #ProbablyRetep”

New Blog Post: (Sandy Bottom(s)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MYlyKi #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/07/07/sandy-bottoms/

Sandy Bottom(s)

Today’s story involves a couple of guys that I picked up at the start of my day.  But first, let me go back a few steps and explain how I begin most of my shifts.

When I head out, if it’s before 8pm then I always go get a car wash and vacuum everything out.  Front, back, and trunk.  I wipe down the seats with lemon cleaner wipes and make sure everything’s nice and clean.  If I think that I’m not going to make it out before 8pm (that’s when the car wash closes), then I will do it at the end of my shift so either way, at the beginning the Jeep is nice and cleaned.

Continue reading “New Blog Post: (Sandy Bottom(s)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MYlyKi #ProbablyRetep”

New Blog Post: (It was the air freshener (srsly)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MyDRFM #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/30/it-was-the-air-freshener-srsly/

It was the air freshener (srsly)

Today I had another interesting pickup.

I had a pickup over in the Eastown area tonight so I headed over to the pickup on Ethel street.  I pulled up to the house and there was several people outside on the porch steps drinking and smoking pot (from the smell of it.)  The girl sauntered outside with the swagger of a 100 shots of liquor and up to my Jeep.  She struggled to open the door to the point that I almost got out to open the door for her.  She gets in, and immediately she asks about my car freshener and tells me if she throws up it’s because of that and not because she’s drunk, while she’s frantically rolling the window down as quickly as possible.  Like, she literally said that.  So i told her what kind it was as I pulled it out of the vent grill and set it aside on the odd chance it was really true.  She then informs me that yes, she’s definitely allergic to that brand and she’s definitely going to puke because of it.  I started off towards her house because it wasn’t very far away, only about 5 minutes.  She spent the entire time assuring me that she wasn’t drunk and that it was the air fresher, even after I assured her I had removed it.

Sure, Girl.

Thankfully we arrived puke free and my puke free streak holds.

New Blog Post: (It was the air freshener (srsly)) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MyDRFM #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/30/it-was-the-air-freshener-srsly/

It was the air freshener (srsly)

Today I had another interesting pickup.

I had a pickup over in the Eastown area tonight so I headed over to the pickup on Ethel street.  I pulled up to the house and there was several people outside on the porch steps drinking and smoking pot (from the smell of it.)  The girl sauntered outside with the swagger of a 100 shots of liquor and up to my Jeep.  She struggled to open the door to the point that I almost got out to open the door for her.  She gets in, and immediately she asks about my car freshener and tells me if she throws up it’s because of that and not because she’s drunk, while she’s frantically rolling the window down as quickly as possible.  Like, she literally said that.  So i told her what kind it was as I pulled it out of the vent grill and set it aside on the odd chance it was really true.  She then informs me that yes, she’s definitely allergic to that brand and she’s definitely going to puke because of it.  I started off towards her house because it wasn’t very far away, only about 5 minutes.  She spent the entire time assuring me that she wasn’t drunk and that it was the air fresher, even after I assured her I had removed it.

Sure, Girl.

Thankfully we arrived puke free and my puke free streak holds.

New Blog Post: (She got out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MzYph7 #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/29/she-got-out-of-the-car-and-you-wont-believe-what-happened-next/

She got out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!

Somebody mentioned that it was “just like me” to post clickbait so I just had to use that title lol.

So, as promised, I have a story from last night’s driving that is a doosey.  I picked up this lady today from out in the 68th and Division area.  I was already a bit nervous about the pickup because I drove about 15 minutes from across town and it seems many times when I do those pickups where I drive 15-20 minutes to pick somebody up it’s always a very short drop off.  So I pull up in front of her house and wait about 4 minutes and she finally saunters out.  Immediately the red flags start going off because she comes out side and sits down in her lawn chair and starts having a cigarette.  She then after she smokes for 2-3 minutes she finally starts stumbling towards the Jeep.  At this point i’m not really sure if she’s drunk or it’s because she’s an older woman, although I’m definitely leaning towards her being drunk because of how long she’s been taking.  So she climbs in which ends up being a several minute process in of itself because she can’t get her little chihuahua to jump up into the Jeep.  She gets in and almost immediately things start going downhill.

It starts out with my usual pleasantries, asking how are you, how was your day, etc etc.  She pretty much ignores what I’m saying and tells me I need to do a U Turn in the driveway across the street.  I inform her that I usually go around the block because the lights on my Jeep are pretty bright and I don’t like pulling into driveways at night because I don’t want to wake anybody up.  She then informs me that I need to do a U Turn in the driveway again, so I do and we start our journey towards the motel.  Now, because I get into the rest of the story I need to establish one thing.  She’s going on a 16 minute drive.  8 minutes there, 8 minutes back.  Probably way less because this is at like midnight or so, and the roads are empty.  So I pull on to Division towards 44th Street and “Rita” as I will call her decides to tell me what’s going on.  She’s picking up her grand kids from her daughter in law and her son because there’s some sort of family drama doing on (again).  She’s telling me about how terrible her son is and she’s sick and tired of always being the one to have to take care of her grand kids.  Now up until this point, she’s been fairly calm.  She’s very clearly inebriated, because she’s slurring her words, talking in broken sentences.  She apologizes and tells me that she’s drunk because she wasn’t expecting to get the phone call about the kids so she was at home relaxing.  At this point I’m pretty much hook line and sinker feeling terrible for this lady’s situation.  Boy was I in for a surprise.

At this point she starts like freaking out.  Like yelling and cursing.  She’s basically repeating the same information over and over except she’s yelling it and mixed in with expletives.  Currently I’m giving her a pass because I understand what she’s going through being upset about her grand kids.  I can understand the frustration.  She barks some more orders about putting some music on.  I turn on some beach boys as requested because there just happens to be a dedicated Beach Boys station currently on my SiriusXM radio.  It’s a slower song so she’s not happy about it and asks me to put some 70’s music on.  And by asks, I do of course, mean she yells as me and orders me.  At this point we’re about 7 minutes into our ride and I’m starting to get a bit annoyed, but I keep telling myself that she’s in a bad spot and she can’t help it.  We pull in to the “Motel”.  I use the quotation marks because the sign says Motel, but it’s even worse than the stigma that would normally be perceived when you think of a Motel vs a Hotel.  This place is the kind of spot where it’s several different buildings.  Each little bungalo type building appears to have 4 rooms in it.  Which is remarkable because each little building is so small it appears to be the size of maybe my living room and the next room put together.  VERY small.

I pull in and she informs me that she’s not sure what room they’re actually in.  But she thinks it’s room 108.  So I start driving around this place and all I’m seeing is up to 40.  Nothing higher.  She orders me to drive around more.  I do, and we circle around the place several more times. and I come to the same conclusion.  So I drive back up to the front and she starts calling her son and and screaming at the voice mail.  I’m going to shorten down this middle part because this whole process was just repeated over and for the next 50 minutes or so.  Screaming, cursing, her getting out and walking around with her dog, getting back in, slamming my door over and over and over and over.  Finally, she decides that she’s had enough and we start heading back to her house.  We get about 6 minutes out of 8 into our trip back to her house and she gets a phone call back from her kids.  They start yelling at each other on the phone and the lady tells me to turn back around and meet them in the McDonalds parking lot right next door.  At this point I’m furious because I’ve spend a sneeze away from an hour for this one ride, and while I feel for what this lady is going through, I’ve got bills to pay, and I can’t do that spending an hour for one ride I’m not getting paid for.  So I pull into the McDonalds where the lady assures me her grand kids are there and waiting for us, and low and behold they’re not there.  She calls them again and then she asks me to wait a few more minutes.  At this point I’ve had enough.

I politely inform her that I’m going to need her to call another Lyft because I’ve spent an hour already driving around and not getting paid.  Surprisingly enough, she apologizes and tells me she understands.  She of course took about 5 minutes to get out and by this time her grand daughter has walked up to the Jeep.  She introduces me and then finally gets out of the Jeep.  Her grand daughter asks her what’s going on and “Rita” tells her that she’s been kicked out.  At this point the grand daughter starts screaming at me and tries to kick my Jeep.  So I politely peel away and listening to her grand daughter scream obscenities at me over a situation she literally has no idea about.

I had to go pull into a gas station and sit for about 15 minutes to calm down after the whole ordeal.  I felt bad because I know she was in a bad situation, and the kids as well.  But I have a strong suspicion that the night would not have ended any time soon if I continued to “drive” “Rita” around.

Anyways, there’s my story.

New Blog Post: (She got out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MzYph7 #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/29/she-got-out-of-the-car-and-you-wont-believe-what-happened-next/

She got out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!

Somebody mentioned that it was “just like me” to post clickbait so I just had to use that title lol.

So, as promised, I have a story from last night’s driving that is a doosey.  I picked up this lady today from out in the 68th and Division area.  I was already a bit nervous about the pickup because I drove about 15 minutes from across town and it seems many times when I do those pickups where I drive 15-20 minutes to pick somebody up it’s always a very short drop off.  So I pull up in front of her house and wait about 4 minutes and she finally saunters out.  Immediately the red flags start going off because she comes out side and sits down in her lawn chair and starts having a cigarette.  She then after she smokes for 2-3 minutes she finally starts stumbling towards the Jeep.  At this point i’m not really sure if she’s drunk or it’s because she’s an older woman, although I’m definitely leaning towards her being drunk because of how long she’s been taking.  So she climbs in which ends up being a several minute process in of itself because she can’t get her little chihuahua to jump up into the Jeep.  She gets in and almost immediately things start going downhill.

It starts out with my usual pleasantries, asking how are you, how was your day, etc etc.  She pretty much ignores what I’m saying and tells me I need to do a U Turn in the driveway across the street.  I inform her that I usually go around the block because the lights on my Jeep are pretty bright and I don’t like pulling into driveways at night because I don’t want to wake anybody up.  She then informs me that I need to do a U Turn in the driveway again, so I do and we start our journey towards the motel.  Now, because I get into the rest of the story I need to establish one thing.  She’s going on a 16 minute drive.  8 minutes there, 8 minutes back.  Probably way less because this is at like midnight or so, and the roads are empty.  So I pull on to Division towards 44th Street and “Rita” as I will call her decides to tell me what’s going on.  She’s picking up her grand kids from her daughter in law and her son because there’s some sort of family drama doing on (again).  She’s telling me about how terrible her son is and she’s sick and tired of always being the one to have to take care of her grand kids.  Now up until this point, she’s been fairly calm.  She’s very clearly inebriated, because she’s slurring her words, talking in broken sentences.  She apologizes and tells me that she’s drunk because she wasn’t expecting to get the phone call about the kids so she was at home relaxing.  At this point I’m pretty much hook line and sinker feeling terrible for this lady’s situation.  Boy was I in for a surprise.

At this point she starts like freaking out.  Like yelling and cursing.  She’s basically repeating the same information over and over except she’s yelling it and mixed in with expletives.  Currently I’m giving her a pass because I understand what she’s going through being upset about her grand kids.  I can understand the frustration.  She barks some more orders about putting some music on.  I turn on some beach boys as requested because there just happens to be a dedicated Beach Boys station currently on my SiriusXM radio.  It’s a slower song so she’s not happy about it and asks me to put some 70’s music on.  And by asks, I do of course, mean she yells as me and orders me.  At this point we’re about 7 minutes into our ride and I’m starting to get a bit annoyed, but I keep telling myself that she’s in a bad spot and she can’t help it.  We pull in to the “Motel”.  I use the quotation marks because the sign says Motel, but it’s even worse than the stigma that would normally be perceived when you think of a Motel vs a Hotel.  This place is the kind of spot where it’s several different buildings.  Each little bungalo type building appears to have 4 rooms in it.  Which is remarkable because each little building is so small it appears to be the size of maybe my living room and the next room put together.  VERY small.

I pull in and she informs me that she’s not sure what room they’re actually in.  But she thinks it’s room 108.  So I start driving around this place and all I’m seeing is up to 40.  Nothing higher.  She orders me to drive around more.  I do, and we circle around the place several more times. and I come to the same conclusion.  So I drive back up to the front and she starts calling her son and and screaming at the voice mail.  I’m going to shorten down this middle part because this whole process was just repeated over and for the next 50 minutes or so.  Screaming, cursing, her getting out and walking around with her dog, getting back in, slamming my door over and over and over and over.  Finally, she decides that she’s had enough and we start heading back to her house.  We get about 6 minutes out of 8 into our trip back to her house and she gets a phone call back from her kids.  They start yelling at each other on the phone and the lady tells me to turn back around and meet them in the McDonalds parking lot right next door.  At this point I’m furious because I’ve spend a sneeze away from an hour for this one ride, and while I feel for what this lady is going through, I’ve got bills to pay, and I can’t do that spending an hour for one ride I’m not getting paid for.  So I pull into the McDonalds where the lady assures me her grand kids are there and waiting for us, and low and behold they’re not there.  She calls them again and then she asks me to wait a few more minutes.  At this point I’ve had enough.

I politely inform her that I’m going to need her to call another Lyft because I’ve spent an hour already driving around and not getting paid.  Surprisingly enough, she apologizes and tells me she understands.  She of course took about 5 minutes to get out and by this time her grand daughter has walked up to the Jeep.  She introduces me and then finally gets out of the Jeep.  Her grand daughter asks her what’s going on and “Rita” tells her that she’s been kicked out.  At this point the grand daughter starts screaming at me and tries to kick my Jeep.  So I politely peel away and listening to her grand daughter scream obscenities at me over a situation she literally has no idea about.

I had to go pull into a gas station and sit for about 15 minutes to calm down after the whole ordeal.  I felt bad because I know she was in a bad situation, and the kids as well.  But I have a strong suspicion that the night would not have ended any time soon if I continued to “drive” “Rita” around.

Anyways, there’s my story.

New Blog Post: (Going up…. On a Tuesday!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MpYX96 #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/26/going-up-on-a-tuesday/

Going up…. On a Tuesday!

It’s Tuesday aka laundry day. We got here a little late today than I would have liked but thankfully it’s not too busy.  I don’t mind it being busy but the noise is what gets to me.  Too much screaming I and such gets on my nerves.  We would have been gone by now but somebody, we won’t say any names (me) forgot to actually turn one of the machines on so we ended up having to stay longer.   I like coming to this laundromat because the prices are decent and it’s usually pretty quiet.   Usually. Continue reading “New Blog Post: (Going up…. On a Tuesday!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MpYX96 #ProbablyRetep”

New Blog Post: (Going up…. On a Tuesday!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MpYX96 #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on https://www.probablyretep.com/2018/06/26/going-up-on-a-tuesday/

Going up…. On a Tuesday!

It’s Tuesday aka laundry day. We got here a little late today than I would have liked but thankfully it’s not too busy.  I don’t mind it being busy but the noise is what gets to me.  Too much screaming I and such gets on my nerves.  We would have been gone by now but somebody, we won’t say any names (me) forgot to actually turn one of the machines on so we ended up having to stay longer.   I like coming to this laundromat because the prices are decent and it’s usually pretty quiet.   Usually. Continue reading “New Blog Post: (Going up…. On a Tuesday!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2MpYX96 #ProbablyRetep”

New Blog Post: (He went to get out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2xeffPY #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on http://www.probablyretep.com/2018/05/24/he-went-to-get-out-of-the-car-and-you-wont-believe-what-happened-next/

He went to get out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!

Do you like my “clickbait” article title?  I think it’s pretty amazing lol.

Things have been pretty quiet on the Uber / Lyft end lately.  I had those first few stories, and then I’ve had some pretty nice people since then.  Well mostly.  The thing I notice the most is how crappy a bunch of people can be when they drink (too much).  It amazes me.  It amazes me how badly people treat each other after they’ve become drunk.  The number of mean people that I’ve picked up is quite surprising to be honest.  I picked up a Continue reading “New Blog Post: (He went to get out of the car, and you won’t believe what happened next!) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2xeffPY #ProbablyRetep”

New Blog Post: (Uber intersting, the Lyft I had…) has been published on ProbablyRetep http://bit.ly/2FMjAZw #ProbablyRetep

New Post has been published on http://www.probablyretep.com/2018/05/05/uber-intersting-the-lyft-i-had/

Uber intersting, the Lyft I had…

Before I get into my story, I guess I should preface it with the fact that I’m no longer at my old job.  Last week was my last week there, and I worked my last shift on Saturday.  So ya.  For now I’m going to be driving Uber / Lyft full time until I decide to either go back to school or I find something else more “careerish”.  So, that being said and out of the way.  ON TO THE STORY!

So today I started driving for Uber and Lyft.  I started this afternoon for about 4 hours and then came home for dinner and then hit the road again around 10pm till about 3:30am.  Man.  The amount of craziness tonight was astounding.  I love it!  I feel like it’s almost the perfect job for me because I just love talking to people.  The whole sitting in the car for extending periods of time makes my restless legs… well restless.  Also, I drank way too much liquids in the last 24 hours, because I kept having to stop like every 2 hours lol.

So the first great story was the mid 30’s mom I picked up from Billy’s.  She was quite inebriated of course, but I had a feeling it was going to be interesting.  She then started to tell me about how a year ago she had gotten a DUI because she got into a fight with her husband and went to the bar to drink.  She then told me she left the bar to meet up with a dude to cheat on her husband with.  Who, by the way, had just paid to have her get a boob job.  I’m of course cutting a lot of details out because she put the wrong address into the app so we had to go across town.  I then got to hear the story of how there’s a line or two waiting for her when she gets to her friends house.

The next story is of the couple that I picked up on the NE side of town heading to one of the bars downtown.  When I pulled up, they were outside waiting so at first I was super pumped.  Then I took a good look at them and realized the hipsterness that was about to enter my Jean Grey (that’s the name of my Jeep.)  They were super friendly the entire ride, but about 3 minutes into talking with me they must’ve figure out that despite the beard, nose ring, and fauxhawk, that I’m not much more of a hipster.  So then I got to listen to them talk to each other about how fantastic something was — I think pottery?, and how amazing that the speckles are able to show up when you work with it.  They continued to talk about how everybody’s doing this now and it’s all over Etsy and on and on.  My brain was numb by the time I dropped them off lolol.

Next was the 4 girls I picked up from Eastown and took 4 blocks to their house.  They left me with a flower.  And all the dirt that used to be attached to the flower.  Definitely won the award for loudest riders of the evening.  Super nice, just really loud.

Finally in the category of craziness was the two girls I picked up from East GR.  They were apparently from Indiana and drove 3 hours to hang out with some boys.  They were leaving because one of them got bit by the dog at the house they were going to stay at.  They were going to have to stay in a room that apparently some other random chick was sleeping in — with “friends” aka a bunch of spiders.  Honestly it sounded like a disaster so it was probably best they left.

I also had several other riders that were pretty interesting in general because of the conversation.  I picked up one guy who was a Software Engineer for Spectrum Health.  We had some interesting nerd chat about that.  My first rider of the evening was actually one of my former co-workers.  It was great to see her and catch up (so if you’re reading this, HI SAM!).  I didn’t realize she lived like around the corner from me so that was interesting.

Anyways, since I’m not working 70-80 hours a week anymore, I’m gonna try to post more often.  Maybe recap my rides every night or so, if I have funny stories to talk about.

TTFN!